MAY 1936, after a prolonged period of alcoholism, my friends,
my associates, my superiors, and those people who really
loved me in spite of embarrassments too numerous to mention,
finally left me because they had come to the conclusion
that I didn't have any idea of doing or trying to do the
I was a spineless
individual who didn't care a rap for anyone or anything-I
was hopeless and knew it-and then in my extremity, The
Divine Comforter, "Truth" came to me in a barroom where
I had spent the major portion of six weeks.
The Divine Comforter,
in my experience, came in the guise of a former drinking
companion whom I had assisted home on several occasions.
Because of physical infirmities brought about by alcoholic
success, he had been unable to walk a distance of three
blocks to his home unassisted, when I last saw him. Now
he approached me, and to my amazement he was sober and
appeared greatly improved in physical condition.
He induced me to take
a ride with him, and as we rode along told me of the marvelous
thing that had come into his life. He had more than a
practical idea of my difficulties, he also had a logical
and practical idea as to how they might be overcome.
He started the conversation
by explaining acute alcoholism and stated very bluntly
that I was an alcoholic.
was news to me in spite of the fact that I had promised
everybody East of the Mississippi, if they would take
time to listen, that I was through with drink. At the
time I made these promises, I honestly wanted to quit
drinking, but for some unknown reason hadn't seemed able
to. He told me why I failed.
He then suggested
that I accompany him to a local doctor who had been helpful
to him. It took forty-eight hours of persuasion and quite
a few drinks to fortify myself, but I finally agreed to
go. The doctor turned out to be one who had been an alcoholic
himself, and in gratitude for the release he had found
and because he understood the true meaning of the phrase
"Brotherly Love" was spending a great portion of his time
helping unfortunate individuals like myself.
With the help and
advice of these two individuals and two or three associates,
I was able, for the first time in two and a half years,
to stay sober for six weeks, and then disastrously tried
the beer experiment. For some time I couldn't get hold
of myself, but gradually came out of hiding and exposed
myself again to this influence which had been so helpful.
July 2, 1936, I again
contacted the two individuals, and since that day I have
never had a drink. However, because of the difficulties
I encountered as the result of the beer experiment, I
was unable for some time to find reality in this new way
of life. I was doubtful, fearful, full of self-pity, afraid
to humiliate myself.
This unreality lasted
until December 11th, when I was faced with the absolute
necessity of raising a sum of money. For the first time
came the realization that
was faced with a difficulty from which I seemed unable
to extricate myself. Of course, I to ok time out to bemoan
the fact that "after all I'd done, this had to happen
to me" but on the advice of my wife, I reluctantly went
to a banker.
I told him my story
completely. I went to him believing that my need was money.
I went there as a last resort to attempt to pry it loose
to meet my needs. My need was not money, but again I had
been led to the proper source. After having related my
story to the banker, who knew my reputation not only as
an alcoholic but as an individual who didn't pay his bills,
he said, "I know something of what you are trying to do,
and I believe you are on the right track. Are you right
with the Father who knows y our needs before you ask?
If so, you are not dependent upon this bank or any individual
in it, or any rules by which we operate, because your
help comes from an ever present and all powerful Father.
I am going to do everything I can to secure this loan
for you. However, I don't want anything that happens here
to throw you off the track, I want you to leave here feeling
that you have done everything you could to secure those
funds, and go about your business. Your business is business
with God's work. I don't know whether that calls for you
to go and collect a bill, sell some new contract, or to
sit quietly and pray, but your Father knows and if you
will but permit Him, He will direct you."
I had again found
reality. My needs were met from another entirely unexpected
manifestations of this ever present Power in my experience
since 1936 are too numerous to mention. Let it suffice
to say that I am profoundly grateful for the opportunities
I have had of seeing and knowing "TRUTH."
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